Because Of You
by LibbyLumos
Summary: Draco's afraid to fall in love for fear he'll turn out like his father, Lucius, a cold, evil creature who thinks of Domestic Abuse as a sport. When he become cold and distant, she's the only one who can help. After all, he helped her once too... Oneshot based on the song 'Because Of You' by Kelly Clarkson. COMPLETE!


**Hello, and welcome to Because Of You.**

**This story is a One Shot Songfic for Because Of You by Kelly Clarkson.**

**So I started this story a while ago. I made it into a four chapter story beforehand, but it wasn't finished. And then I read over the story, and decided it would be a better story if it were a one shot. Besides, I've never written a one shot before, so I'm kinda excited about it…**

**If this gets a good reaction, I might carry it on… because I think more stuff could be involved in this story and a lot of things, but I really like it as it is now… But anyway, let me know what you think and yeah XD**

**So yeah, that kind of covers it xD I wrote this over Christmas, but it doesn't have a really Christmas-y theme to it, I know… But I like it… Soooooo yeah, hope you do too :D**

_**~Because Of You by Kelly Clarkson~**_

_**Two years after the war:**_

The lights in the Great Hall were brighter than he remembered. Maybe they'd been fixed that way after the war had ended. Maybe the lighting had been too dull for the builders. They burnt his eyes, or maybe it wasn't the light, but the images flickering around in his head. The image of her, blonde hair matted with blood as she lay weeping on the floor. The banners from Gryffindor's win of the House Cup year before last reminded him of the pools of dreaded crimson liquid pooling around her lifeless body.

She twitched in his vision, and that gave him hope. At least, it had, until the Healers had started shouting and shaking their heads.

That was why he preferred the dark now. In the dark, anything could happen, maybe, but you couldn't see it.

In the light, you could see everything, feel everything, and watch everything fall apart in the space of a few seconds.

Yes, darkness was welcomed. Darkness hid those you didn't want to see, hid the pain, torture, the death.

Those in the light know we die in the dark. But sometimes, that was a thing people were grateful for. No one had to watch you suffer in the dark.

The constant chattering from his table was an aid to his pain, also. He could no longer hear the terrified screams echoing around his head. No longer witness the hurt he had seen in the light.

There was only artificial light here, and for that, he was especially grateful. There was little pain.

It didn't aid him, however, when Pansy and Millicent threw themselves at him. They were starting what he was trying to prevent, the 'perfect' relationship between two Purebloods that didn't even love each other.

He wouldn't accept that.

He couldn't.

Not if he wanted to stop himself from turning out like that 'father' of his.

If he wanted to be his own person, he'd need to get way from these girls. So that's what he did. He walked out of the Great Hall, stormed really, away to the Astrology Tower, leaving Pansy and Millicent behind, still leaning into the empty space where he once sat.

He wanted to go back, to punish them for being so useless and pathetic, to shout at them and cause them embarrassment, like they had caused him.

But he stopped himself. He was held accountable for every idle word that he used, and if he used any of the words that were spiralling around his head, he knew it would start.

He couldn't become his father. He may have made a lot of mistakes, but there were ways for him to make them right, there were ways to stop himself from making the same mistakes his father had. He just had to work on it. He just had to find the time.

No one saw her follow him.

_**~I Will Not Make The Same Mistake That You Did~**_

_**~I Will Not Let Myself Cause My Heart So Much Misery~**_

_**~And I Will Not Break The Way You Did You Fell So Hard~**_

_**~I Learned The Hard Way To Never Let It Get That Far~**_

He stood with his back to the door, leaning over the clock tower. Tears were still falling from his eyes, and he didn't even bother to wipe them away. He watched as each drop fell alongside the rain, to hit the ground, where the Beloved Headmaster had fallen before the war had begun.

His father was a monster before then, but Draco had thought that was so the Dark Lord would not punish them himself, with worse beating that his father could blow and countless uses of the Cruciatus curse.

He was wrong.

His father stayed a monster long after the war.

All the way up until the castle was rebuilt, Draco had to suffer watching his mother cry, in the foetal position, attempting to protect herself from the blows of her husband's cane.

Unfaithful. Whore. Tramp. _Traitor._

His mother was not a traitor.

"She's not the traitor." He whispered into the wind, too quiet for anyone's ears, but still wincing at the cracks his voice held, showing his vulnerability. He was Draco Malfoy. He couldn't afford to be vulnerable. It wasn't right for him, the Slytherin Prince, to show his softer side to _anyone_.

"Malfoy?"

He froze up. He couldn't move to wipe his eyes; she'd know he'd been crying. He couldn't speak because he knew his voice would crack, just like it had seconds before. So he just faced straight ahead, pretending she wasn't there, but arguing with himself in his mind.

_Had she heard him?_

_Did she know what that meant?_

_Why is she here?_

"Malfoy, what's wrong?"

_Everything._He didn't reply.

"You're not supposed to be out past curfew…"

_I needed to be alone._Still nothing.

"Shall I go get Professor McGonagall?"

He whipped himself around and shot daggers at her, "What do you want, Granger?"

"To check you're okay."

Hermione stood in front of him, closer than he thought she was. She bit her lip slightly, and worry was evident in her eyes. He gasped as he saw the proxemics and took a quick step back, closer to the edge of the railing, near to falling over the edge. He stumbled back slightly, but his hands wrapped around the rails just as Hermione grabbed onto his shoulder. He flinched and tried to shuffle her off. He shimmied, and Hermione had difficulty trying to hold him still. Eventually she gave up and took her hands away, a secure feeling that he wasn't going to throw himself over the rails.

"Stop…" she stuttered slightly, before taking a deep breath, "Stop trying to move away from me, Malfoy. I came here to help you, not to persuade you to throw yourself off the edge."

"Why? You hate me remember?"

She laughed once, harshly. "Even if I did. Doesn't mean I can't care."

He didn't miss her use of the past tense. "Yes it does." He stormed towards her, "You're not supposed to care for me. You hate me. You're supposed to want me dead!" He pushed her back against the door and leaned in so close; preventing her from escaping, even if she'd wanted to.

"I would never wish that pain on anyone. I wouldn't even wish the pain you're feeling now on someone." She whimpered, "I saw how you left the hall." His eyes were starting to scare her, shooting daggers into hers, full of burning hate, pain and hurt. She knew that it wasn't all meant for her. She could feel that. Someone else was hurting him, and she was determined to help.

"So you've been watching me? Are you going to throw yourself at me like Parkinson and Bulstrode? Thought you were a prude, Granger."

"I'm not watching you; you just made a rather dramatic exit. And I'm not going to throw myself at you. And that's just offensive." She sighed and rolled her eyes at him, "Now, let me help you!"

"For Merlin's sake, Hermione, just stop! Stop trying to help! You can't help!" He sobbed into her shoulder.

Her mind was racing. He'd called her by her name! She wasn't Granger anymore. She wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her head on his shoulder, whispering words of comfort to him. He'd called her Hermione...

His sobs echoed through the tower, and eventually he let her go and sat down on the floor, leaning against the wall she was standing by. She sat with him.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really. I don't think I'm ready to yet."

She nodded and he bent his neck to lean on her shoulder again. She rested her head on his and stroked his hair soothingly. He tensed at first, but after a moment, he relaxed into her side.

"Things will get better, Draco, I promise."

"You called me Draco…" he breathed. His heart was speeding up, enjoying the sound his name made as it fell from her lips.

"Yes, and you called me Hermione." She whispered happily, pressing her lips to his hair. He sat thinking for a while before he let out a humourless chuckle.

"I guess I did… I guess... I feel like I can trust you..."

"Of course you can, Draco. I'm here for you to talk to. Now, are you feeling any better?" she whispered. He nodded lightly.

"Thank you, Hermione." he replied, heart beating like a jack rabbit as he repeated her name, "But… why are you helping me?"

"I know what it feels like to lose someone you love." she whispered, her voice cracking slightly. He sat up and looked at her, catching movement as she wiped off a tear from her cheek. He caught her hand, stopping her, and wiped off the tear gently with own hand.

"Hey, hey, its okay, you can cry if you want to... It's just me..."

"I know, but-"

"No buts. You've seen me cry, let me have my dignity."

She nodded slowly and laughed quietly, shaking her head as if shaking away all the bad memories.

"How did you know I'd lost someone?" he whispered, pulling her closer into his chest. She was the one that needed comforting here. She'd helped him, so now it was his turn to repay the favour.

"I only knew because you had the same dull, faraway look in your eyes that I used to carry. But when you find a good friend to lean on, you can improve, get back to normal, maybe even better than normal. You change things in your life that you would never have thought of changing."

There was a moment's silence.

"Who did you fall back on?" he asked quietly, staring out at the stars. He thought of Potty and Weaselbee, but neither seemed like someone you could talk to about this situation. Potter would end up talking about his parents and everyone else he'd lost in the war, switching the sympathy to him. Weaselbee has lost one of the twins, and was still grieving over that.

There was another moment before she stood up, brushed herself down, and stuck a hand out to help Draco up. He took it, and rose to stand in front of her, in the way of the door so she couldn't escape before he answered his question.

"You." she replied, quietly, smiling slightly.

He stood there staring at her, stunned, and she took this moment to dodge around him and flounce out of the door.

Draco just stood staring at the doorway.

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Never Stray Too Far From The Sidewalk~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Learned To Play On The Safe Side So I Don't Get Hurt~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Find It Hard To Trust~**_

_**~Not Only Me But Everyone Around Me~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Am Afraid~**_

That one comment took his breath away. He stood, dumb founded, staring after her as she walked off and down the spiralling staircase.

He stood rooted to the spot for a while. Unsure of how long he had been there.

Tonight, she had looked so beautiful with the moonlight illuminating her perfect features... He forgot that she was a _Muggleborn,_because she sure didn't act like one. She was so kind to him, why would she do something like this to him? Didn't she see! She was making him _want_ her. But he couldn't. If he did, he'd hurt her. He couldn't let that happen. He'd stay away from her...

"Mr Malfoy?" Draco looked up, stunned.

Severus Snape stood in front of him, where Hermione had been, brandishing his wand, tip glowing as a result of _Lumos_.

"Professor." he nodded, pulling himself out of his trance.

"My Malfoy, I cannot keep bailing you out of these situations." Snape growled, "Fifty points from Slytherin for being out of bed after curfew."

Draco laughed bitterly, remembering how Hermione had previously threatened to call a teacher before hand, and nodded harshly. Snape's brow furrowed, "Go to bed. Now." he sneered, and then turned on his heel and stormed out of the tower. His voice called back up the stairs. "Bed!"

Draco followed his orders. He'd think out his plan tomorrow. He'd stay away from her.

_**~I Loose My Way And It's Not Too Long Before You Point It Out~**_

_**~I Cannot Cry Because I Know That's Weakness In Your Eyes~**_

_**~I'm Forced To Fake A Smile, A Laugh, Every Day Of My Life~**_

_**~My Heart Can't Possibly Break~**_

_**~When It Wasn't Even Whole To Start With~**_

He couldn't do it.

He'd spent the whole night pondering over what she had said to him about how he was the one who pulled her back after she lost a loved one... What had she meant?

And who had she lost?

He couldn't sleep. He didn't.

_You_.

How had he helped her get over it? That night was the first time he had ever been kind to her. So how did he help her?

He decided to ask her.

The trek to the Great Hall felt longer than it was. He was still half asleep, which didn't help, but no matter what he had tried last night, sleep never came.

He pondered asking Madame Pomfrey to let him have the day off with 'sleeping problems and slight depression' as his doctor had said he'd developed over the summer, but he knew he had to talk to Hermione, to find out what she meant.

He was going to find out. He had to know. He couldn't handle the torture anymore.

Besides, if he had trouble sleeping because he was trying to work out how he'd helped her, then how was he supposed to sleep the next night, if he hadn't yet found the answer?

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Never Stray Too Far From The Sidewalk~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Learned To Play On The Safe Side So I Don't Get Hurt~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Find It Hard To Trust~**_

_**~Not Only Me But Everyone Around Me~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Am Afraid~**_

She was the first person he saw when he walked into the hall; even surrounded by the other Gryffindor's, being pestered by Potter and Weasel.

She couldn't talk to him yet, he knew that. It's not like he was expecting her to ruin her reputation by talking to him in public… After all, she was the Gryffindor Princess…

He strolled slowly back to the Slytherin table, and took his place at the end closest to the door. As he sat down, she caught his eye,

She smiled.

His stomach felt tight. He smiled back lightly, but looked away quickly; hiding the grin as the other nosey Gryffindor's looked around, trying to find the source of her happy appearance.

No one would suspect him. He was an outcast. He was hated by all houses, and avoided by most Slytherin's for fear of his father.

He was alone... aside from her… and aside from-

"Drakie!"

Draco flinched, covering his left ear from the shrill shout that had penetrated his ear drum.

"What do you want Pansy?" He growled.

"I haven't seen you in _forever_ Drakie!"

He looked up to see Hermione, watching him quietly. Her eyes were wide, and he saw a speckle of hurt there.

"You saw me yesterday. Leave me alone." He growled.

"But Drakie! We haven't spent any time together recently!"

"There's a reason for that."

She giggled lightly and nuzzled his neck, nipping lightly on the skin. He caught Hermione's eye again, tears close to falling off her face. His heart dropped.

So he shoved her off.

A shrill scream echoed off the walls of the hall as she hit the floor, bum first.

"Drakie! Why would you do that?"

"Leave. Me. Alone. Parkinson."

"But-"

"No!" he shouted, "I'm sick of it Pansy! Stop throwing yourself at me like a common whore."

Pansy's eyes were wide, and fear filled. She scooted herself away, sobbing slightly.

He looked up at Hermione again, her eyes were wide, afraid, and she was shaking her head lightly. Draco stopped. His mind racing, heart pumping. That was such an adrenaline rush…

Then he realised what he'd done.

_No!_ He couldn't turn out like _him_. He wouldn't allow it!

No.

It couldn't happen.

He turned on his heel and stormed back out of the Great Hall, scooping up a croissant from some random Slytherin's plate. They didn't protest, just picked up another one from the tray and watched silently as he practically sprinted away.

Again, no one saw her follow.

_**~I Watched You Die~**_

_**~I Heard You Cry~**_

_**~Every Night In Your Sleep~**_

_**~I Was So Young~**_

_**~You Should Have Known~**_

_**~Better Than To Lean On Me~**_

_**~You Never Thought~**_

_**~Of Anyone Else~**_

_**~You Just Saw Your Pain~**_

_**~And Now I'm Crying In The Middle Of The Night~**_

_**~For The Same Damn Thing~**_

He hid in the Room of Requirement this time. There was nowhere else for him to go, and this seemed like the only place he could stay hidden from teachers and pupils alike.

A small living room like place had appeared, mainly black to reflect his dark, haunting mood.

He had just sat down on the sofa when he heard the door creak open, and the click of heels hitting the stone floor, approaching him.

He didn't look up.

"Draco?" she whispered. She knelt down in front of him and stretched her hand out to brush his hair behind his ear. He'd been crying again, and this time she knew why.

"Draco, that wasn't your fault. Anyone else would have reacted the same wa-"

"No!" He shouted. Hermione flinched slightly as his face snapped up. Draco winced at her reaction, watching the fear in her eyes. He let out a gentle sob and put his head down. "It's the kind of thing my _father_would have done. The same thing he would have called her!"

"So," she muttered, pulling herself up to sit next to him on the sofa, sliding her feet out of her shoes and curling them under her, "You're afraid of becoming your father?"

"I _am_ my father!"

"No, you're not!" She murmured reassuringly, "You're better than him. Look at you now; you're sitting here, in the company of a _Mudblood-"_

"Don't say that word."

"Why? It described me perfectly does it now?"

"No. It's a foul word. And you don't have dirty blood. That was proved during the war. Our blood looks the same."

"See Draco, you're father throws that word around like it's an everyday saying. You refuse to even hear it now. He brought you up wrong; it's not your fault."

"I believed him, that's my fault."

"You were just a child."

"I had my own mind-"

"No." Hermione placed a hand on his lips. "You were just a child. You were brainwashed. You were taught to believe what he wanted you to, not what was right. You've taught yourself now. You've let other people in. It's about time that you realized that."

"I'm a vile creature."

"Draco-"

"I just threw Pansy off my lap! She looked terrified! I swore that I'd never do that to someone!" He pushed himself off the sofa and paced slightly. Hermione's eyes followed him for a few moments.

"Draco-" she stood up to approach him, and stretched a hand out towards his shoulder.

"I hurt her, Hermione." He shouted, turning towards her. He clenched his fists, and the anger in his eyes was terrifying. Hermione backed into the sofa and sunk down slightly.

Draco let out a breath sharply and sunk down to the floor. He put his elbows on his knees and rested his head against them.

Two arms circled around his neck and pushed him onto the floor. She straddled him and pinned his arms above his head.

"Now, you listen to me now, and you listen to me good," Hermione growled, hovering her face inches from his. He licked his lips slightly, and held in a breath.

"You are not your father." She spaced each word out separately, holding eye contact with him. He felt compelled to agree with her. The effect she had over him was unbelievable.

Even she could feel that he was _very_ content with the position they were currently lying in. She gasped slightly and shifted her weight. That didn't help him.

"No… no… please… stop moving…"

Hermione looked at him with wide eyes.

"You'll just make it worse if you keep moving like that."

"Right… right…" she stuttered, "shall I just… get off… or?"

"Um…"

There was an awkward silence for a moment.

"Sorry about this." He whispered. There was a slight tone of embarrassment in his voice. Hermione just giggled.

"Don't worry about it."

"I blame you anyway." Hermione raised her eyebrows, "You went all dominant and controlling. I like that."

"Oh."

Another awkward silence.

"So… what did you mean yesterday?" Draco finally choked out, "When you said I was the one who helped you?"

"Oh… that… Well, I was depressed, like you, and I thought I'd never be able to pull myself out of it. I kept seeing the images of people I loved, dying. There was my mother and father, my grandparents, Fred…"

"Fred?"

"We'd started… dating… a few weeks before the war started. No one knew. We kept it a well hidden secret, only George knew. But when Fred died in the war… My world felt like it was being ripped apart. Fred and I had argued before we went in. I told him that I wanted him to keep as low key as possible, afraid he'd get killed. He told me to stay with him, and to not go against Voldemort with Harry, thinking I'd be killed.

"We fought over each others safety. In the end, neither of us listened to the others advice. I was lucky to come out of it alive. But when I saw Fred was dying in his brother's arms… I think his family then figured out we had been together. I was crying, screaming for Fred to take me with him.

"His last words were to me: 'Keep fighting.' He'd always liked the fierceness in me, and he said it was something I should hold onto."

Tears had fallen from her face, and she was still leant over Draco, trying not to move. He'd calmed down slightly now, so he rolled her over to she was lying on the floor.

She shook her head slightly, "I sunk into depression. It lasted the whole summer after the war, and half way through the year after, whilst they were building the castle. I could do nothing but cry, sleep, eat little things and stare into the distance. But then Ginny thought I should get out of the house, and took me and Harry to Diagon Alley. That's where I saw you.

"You had just left Flourish and Blotts. I walked straight into you, and you dropped the bag you were carrying. You yelled at me to watch where I was going, that I couldn't see through my bushy hair, which I had been hiding behind so no one would see my tears.

"I countered back, argued with you. You relit the fire inside me."

She snorted lightly, "_Relight my fire…"_She sang to herself, before shaking her head, and smiling up at him.

"I got my anger back. I started to feel again, and I started to fulfil Fred's dying wish. To fight, and fight we did, you and I."

Draco nodded, "We had a screaming match in the middle of the street. Everyone stopped to watch Potter's best friend and a former Death Eater verbally battle it out."

They laughed quietly to each other, Draco's head buried in Hermione's shoulder. She wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him to her chest.

"I'm happy you're helping me, Hermione."

"Good, cause you're not getting rid of me so easily."

Draco smiled and kissed her neck lightly, subconsciously. They both froze.

He pulled back slightly, looking up at her to see if she was angry.

She wasn't. She was smiling lightly.

He hesitantly hovered above her, his face inches from hers. His mind was buzzing with so many different thoughts. _What was she thinking? Does she feel the same way?_

And the main, repetitive one…

_Could he love her without hurting her?_

She answered the first two for him as she lifted her head from the ground and pressed her lips against his.

He growled, wrapping his hand around the back of her head, and lowering her back to the ground. She arched her back, pushing herself up against him, and bit on his bottom lip. He hissed lightly, before tempting her mouth open and guiding his tongue to hers.

When they finally broke apart, they were both panting, and Draco was _happy_ again. He cleared his throat and apologised.

"No need," she whispered, reaching up to pull his lips to hers once, quickly, and then breathing out heavily, with a contempt smile on her face, "So… what happens now?"

"What do you mean?"

"Are we like… together, together? Or is this just a one off thing?"

"What do you want?" he kissed her bottom lip lightly, "Because as long as I get to kiss you and spend time with you, I will take whatever I can get."

Hermione smiled, and kissed him back, "I think I want to keep this going."

"So… together?"

She nodded, "Together."

He kissed her once more, before she turned, giving him access to her neck, whilst she spoke.

"Do we have to keep this between us, or can we do this in public?"

"Well, we can't necessarily do _this_ in public, as it might be classed as inappropriate, but I wouldn't mind people knowing that you're _mine_ and no one else can have you." He sucked on the skin of her neck, leaving a purpling mark.

Hermione gasped, but wrapped her arms back around his neck to hold him closer. "You know, sometimes I feel like he's still here, watching me. Every time I do something right, he nods… If I do something wrong, or if I'm going to be in danger, he shakes his head."

"What's he doing now?" Draco whispered, nuzzling her neck.

_Could he love her without hurting her?_

Her answer gave him the answer he needed for the question in his mind.

"He's smiling."

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Never Stray Too Far From The Sidewalk~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Learned To Play On The Safe Side So I Don't Get Hurt~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Find It Hard To Trust~**_

_**~Not Only Me But Everyone Around Me~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~I Am Afraid~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

_**~Because Of You~**_

**There you have it :D I have written a 4,000 word chapter. First time ever.**

**If you think I should continue this story, please let me know. I will be so happy if people actually like it... I'd be so happy, that I'd be willing to write another 4,000 word chapter for after this one, maybe challenging the issues in their relationship... delve further into Fremione... etc XD**

**So please Review, I will love you all for ever and ever... Reviewers will get cookies and pancakes and a free ticket for the Hogwarts Express ;D**

**Angel x**


End file.
